


Just Tell Me Its True

by Helio



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: (it won't be too detailed), Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Bullying, Hybrid AU, Hybrid Kink, Hybrid Roosterteeth, Kinda, Light Bondage, Light Smut, M/M, Monkey!Geoff, Other minor characters - Freeform, Sex, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Swearing, cat!Michael
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-08
Updated: 2015-11-12
Packaged: 2018-04-19 18:17:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 20,721
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4756325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Helio/pseuds/Helio
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Michael never wanted the brand on his thigh, Gavin was desperately searching for his other half. Neither knew the true meaning of the word 'soulmate'.</p><p>In other words, Michael is a Cat Hybrid who doesn't give a shit about his soulmate (except really he does) and Gavin is a human who couldn't be more interested in the name on his stomach.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so the start of this is very awkward because I kinda rushed/I didn't know what I wanted to do, but I promise once Gavin is introduced (which is only a little bit in) it becomes more fluid and natural, and hopefully pleasant to read.
> 
> I spent an alarming amount of time trying to write this (I'm having trouble focusing) and I hadn't originally planned this to be a Hybrid AU but I'm hoping you all like it. The final part should be up within the next month or so (though who am I kidding it could be longer I really need to sort out my writer's block) but if not I promise I am writing, its just very hard to get things the way I want them and actually find the inspiration to start writing daily.
> 
> I am still working on my other stories, so don't worry, I just have been wanting to do something like this for so long, I had to push everything aside so I could get it done. I know its only half finished but I don't care, I really enjoyed making this, you have no idea.
> 
> (yes the timeline is a bit off for the purpose of the story sorry its an AU)

The marks on Michael's thigh had never really been accepted, or wanted. Everyone had them; the names of their soulmate written onto a part of their body since birth, tattoos that appeared in the womb and never rubbed off, never vanished and couldn't be removed. Some people covered the more noticeable ones, he'd known some people unlucky enough to get them on their neck or hands, one of the places almost never covered unless you had something to hide.

Maybe it was fate being kind to him for once that the name was on his thigh, he never had to show anyone, no one had to know who he was destined for. He was grateful, but it didn't mean he hated the words any less, it didn't mean that it didn't suck even having them in the first place.

As a kid, it had been easy, nobody really knew the importance of the names yet, they were too young to understand and Michael had been blissfully unaware that his mark was almost taboo.

_**Gavin David Free** _

The brand that would be on him for life was the name of a boy. It wasn't as horrible as it used to be, he was quite lucky to live in an area that mostly supported same sex marriages, but he learned quickly that not everyone was so accepting.

When they were all older, Michael just barely starting high school, the other boys had found his mark while changing for Gym. He'd been teased for the rest of his time at that school, even his own brother would laugh cruelly at him, calling him things like 'faggot' and 'princess' which just struck it harder into Michael that he was wrong. A mistake. He was ridiculed, bullied, beaten up and shunned until he was old enough to move away, start a new life learning to be an electrician until he could find his soulmate.

It still wasn't easy, it never would be in his world; there was always someone judging him from a distance, but it didn't stop him from fighting it. He may have hated his brand, he may have loathed it more than anything and even though he didn't show it off to the world, didn't mean he didn't yell at stupid pricks who dared say anything bad about same sex soulmates around him. He was neither proud nor happy, but damn if he was just going to lie down and take shit from people who knew nothing about him or his life.

Even if he hadn't had the name, he'd still be the same, if everyone thought he was straight, they'd still avoid him. People were prejudice against his kind; half-breeds, or animals as he was often called. They made up about a third of the population, but they'd still never be treated as equals by full humans, 'pure humans'. Michael couldn't help but feel bad for his parents, how upset they would have been to discover Michael's tail and ears along with his mark. It wasn't his fault, it was like a genetic glitch, something so rare and almost impossible to be born half when his parents were both pure, but that didn't mean he didn't understand how hard it must have been.

They'd always been nice to him, and to be fair he hadn't had it as bad as he could have, luckily for him people at least thought being born like him was something inescapable. It wasn't a choice in people's eyes, which certainly made it easier, he could almost forget about it sometimes.

Until someone pulled on his tail and made him bare his fangs and hiss. He'd used his teeth in his fair share of fights, they were pretty useful at times but they were a bitch when he accidentally bit his tongue. Sometimes he'd wished to be normal when that happened, but almost all of the time he was happy to be part cat, it was hard but he didn't see himself as Michael without his fluffy tail and ears, and all the little quirks that came with being a half.

He just hoped his soulmate wouldn't care about that part of him. Soulmates were supposed to be perfect for you, but Michael didn't believe in any of that stuff, he thought it was made up, or exaggerated. How could a stupid mark tell him who was perfect for him? No one would be perfect, he would be lucky to get someone who was kind to him. Someone with the name Gavin had to be at least a little like him, right? There's no way he wouldn't have been teased for it at least once.

Michael had to wonder just what sort of person he was, anyway. All he had was a name, no date of birth, no country he was born in, or even if he was alive or dead. He had to feel something if his soulmate died, right? He could have no one and not even know it! Maybe this Gavin had died when Michael was really young?

There was no way to know, he could only hope he still had someone out there with his name on them too. It wasn't something he thought regularly about, though, his soulmate was in passing thoughts occasionally but no more than that. Michael was curious, but he still didn't believe in any of it, he couldn't trust a few words inked into his skin. So, he trusted his heart. There were few who were like him, uncaring of their soulmates, even fewer who could look past his cat half and the name on his thigh, but there were some he dated, some he loved, some he slept with.

No one had ever given him a big spark, or made him feel like they were the only person in the world for him, but he didn't need them to. He didn't need them to be perfect and sweep him off his feet, he needed stability, kindness, for someone to love him, and not just because a stupid tattoo told them to.

Michael needed to know he could be good enough for someone by just being himself, and he was. He was good enough for plenty, good enough for himself and he didn't give a damn about his soulmate. The only relationship he could ever have with Gavin would be fake, based off writing that could have been made by anybody just to fuck with everyone. Soulmates weren't always perfect loves, they were just made out to be that way and Michael knew it.

So, he kept his head held high and the name firmly out of his thoughts, he focused on himself, on getting somewhere safe. New Jersey wasn't the best of places, so that's how he found it, the perfect place for him.

Rooster Teeth was something he'd dreamed of for years, a safe haven for Hybrids and humans to coexist, to work together equally and have fun while doing it. The company made videos about games, and even had a series going on called 'Red Vs Blue' which was extremely popular. He couldn't believe it at first, that a place like that even existed, that it was doing well. The company was only growing and Michael was determined to hop on that ship before it sailed away without him.

When he finally got noticed and accepted into the company, he'd almost screamed. He'd been waiting for an email from Geoff for a few days to see if he'd gotten a permanent position in the Achievement Hunter part of Rooster Teeth and when he read that he could move whenever, the first thing he did was start packing. He found himself purring constantly as he shoved his things into a small suitcase, not having much to take, and not caring about anything he left behind.

With this job, he could just buy replacements for whatever, Michael didn't really want things that gave him memories of New Jersey anyway, he wanted to move on and be happy for once. So he did, he caught the next flight to Austin when he'd finished packing and got there after 3 and a half hours stuck in a plane. He wasn't complaining, though, in fact he was still purring as he hailed a cab outside the airport, a huge grin on his face.

This was something he did all on his own, no help from friends or family, he just managed to convince Geoff he was worth hiring. He even got the shitty apartment on his own, with money saved up from his job as an electrician. He didn't need help, if he could move all the way to fucking Texas by himself, he could do anything.

Michael felt more than inspired, even as he moved into his apartment, still waiting for most of his things that he'd shipped before he got on his flight. Maybe he had to sleep on the floor for a while before he could actually buy a bed, but the sleeping bag wasn't too bad. The apartment felt more and more like home as everything finally made its way there and being part cat made it easier to lie in uncomfortable places.

Work kept him busy, coming up with ideas and videos took a lot out of him, but he wasn't even complaining a little. Everything was just fucking fine, Geoff was great, as well as Jack, he even got to rub it in Ray's face when they played together that he was finally doing something that made him happy. It was especially great to be surrounded by so many hybrids, bonding with Geoff most of all, who was part Monkey, himself.

Things were finally perfect, for once. 

 

* * *

 

It was just Michael's luck, wasn't it? He just had to go fuck everything up by thinking about how everything couldn't be more perfect. Well, two weeks later, his apartment now fully set up, Michael had more of a spring in his step than ever as he carried in the morning coffees for him and his coworkers, to have his mood almost instantly soured at the sight of someone new in their small office.

He'd known there was someone who already worked there that had been away in England for a while when he joined, but he'd never imagined it could be someone like this. Immediately he'd known this guy was a _fucking_ idiot, tangled in cables around his feet and trying to set up his computer without falling over - though he'd already done it twice and Michael had only been standing there for about a minute.

The point was, no matter how good looking he was (he could admit that he did have a certain charm to him, even while having quite possibly the largest nose he'd ever seen) Michael just knew there was no way they could get along. So he stood dumbfounded in the doorway, listening to the idiot make weird noises and speak with a thick accent that normally would have been sexy to him, if only it was on anyone else.

 _How can Geoff like this guy? He couldn't stop talking about him just yesterday and how funny he was!_ Michael thought bitterly, glaring slightly at the asshole that just had to put his stuff right next to Michael's. His tail bristled and his ears twitched grumpily as he finally decided to go in and give the coffees to Geoff and Jack, before sitting down in front of his computer.

"Hi, I don't believe we've met, mate. I'm Gavin Free." The guy - Gavin - said, making Michael's ears twitch just a bit as he composed his face. There was no fucking way, so why even think it?

"Uh, I'm Michael," he mumbled, reaching out to shake the boy's hand before turning back to his computer before he could see his reaction. There really was no way that this guy could be it, right? It had to be a coincidence, "you should probably untangle your feet from those cables, dude, you keep fucking landing on your face like a moron every ten seconds."

Maybe he was being a bit harsh, maybe he was just imagining things, but it seemed like Gavin fell over onto him on purpose just to annoy him as soon as he'd said that. He had to contain himself from yelling at the prick, his tail thumping hard against his chair while he grit his teeth and bit back a growl. He'd knocked over some of the things on Michael's desk, including his coffee, which was now soaking his keyboard.

He moved quick to wipe it up while Gavin spewed out apologies left and right, reaching over to help Michael clean up, only to get his hands batted away by an even more annoyed Michael.

"Calm down, Gavin," Geoff said, a lazy grin on his face as he placed a hand on the side of Gavin's neck, instantly shutting him up and setting him at ease, it seemed, "you know you just cause more trouble when you freak out." He teased, making Gavin pout and shove Geoff off him, crouching down to untangle his feet as Michael finally got everything cleaned up.

"You're fucking paying for any damages you just caused," Michael grunted as he chucked the napkins he'd used to clean the mess in the bin, "and you're buying me another coffee, asshole."

Gavin gave him a sheepish smile before turning back to continue his set up. Michael's tail thumped against his chair in annoyance once again before he decided to just settle back in his chair and get started on some work. His keyboard was sticky and his mood was sour, but he at least managed to get past hating the stupid Brit.

The rest of the morning was mostly uneventful, Gavin being more careful around Michael and making sure not to cause any more accidents near him. Michael was glad for that at least, eventually he got work done, distracted from his ruined morning while he tapped away at his computer.

The quiet didn't last long.

He should have known he'd be the type that just naturally attracted accidents. After lunch Michael came back to half of his things on the floor and a disgruntled Gavin trying to put everything back in its place before Michael returned. 

"What the fuck?" he growled, more of a statement than a question as he stomped over and pulled Gavin up by the collar, noticing he went silent when his fingers brushed against his neck. "you've got to be kidding me right? What the fuck did you do? You're a piece of shit, you know, knocking over my coffee, and now all my stuff is on the fucking floor! I can't believe you." Michael could almost scream at him, a growl rising in his throat, his fingers clenching into a fist. He was ready to punch him in his stupid face or sink his canines into his neck, whichever would get the idiot to stop fucking up.

Twice in one day? How could Michael not be pissed off with him?

"Answer me." He said harshly when Gavin didn't answer, trying to look intimidating as he wrapped his fingers around the side of Gavin's neck. He wouldn't actually strangle him, but it seemed to be a sensitive part of him that probably scared him to have touched.

"It was an accident," Gavin said almost immediately his head slightly lolling into Michael's touch as the rest of him went still, "I tripped on one of my shoes and landed on your desk. It tipped over and everything just sort of fell out. Please don't be mad Michael." The last part was said with a whimper, striking something in Michael that made him deflate visibly. He didn't mean to make Gavin upset, no matter how angry he was with him.

He scratched his nails lightly against the side of Gavin's neck as he pulled away, reveling in the shivers it gave the Brit. He deserved worse, but Michael was too tired to do anything to him that afternoon. "Go buy me a coffee and I'll forgive you." He mumbled with a roll of his eyes as he started collecting his things off the floor, smirking just a bit at how quick and eager Gavin was to please him, rushing out of the office already. He really wasn't so bad, an annoyance at the most, but if Geoff trusted him, liked him, then Michael could learn to stand him.

By the end of the day Michael had learned to deal with Gavin's antics, finding himself smiling slightly at how loud and energetic the man could be as they recorded their first video together. It was something simple where they showed off their strange dynamic of Gavin being a moron and Michael getting angry at him. By the end of it, he felt strangely closer to Gavin, feeling almost happy every time Gavin would give him a smile or would compliment him.

Maybe it was stupid, maybe his opinion on the man had changed far too quickly, but Michael wasn't complaining. After all, if they were going to work together, it was definitely better if they got along, if they were friends.

When they were finished recording, Gavin turned to him with a grin, Michael returning it with a roll of his eyes but a small purr to let him know he'd had fun as well.

"I reckon this is the start of something, boi! I bet we'll be top friends in no time." Gavin said, his shit eating grin still stretched wide across his face as he swiveled his chair to face him fully.

"I swear to god you're just making those words up to mess with me." Michael mumbled, shaking his head but still purring as he leant back in his own seat once he'd checked the recording hadn't fucked up somewhere along the line. He tucked his tail through the side of his chair and let it lay limp so the tip grazed the floor, before reaching up to massage his ears through the beanie he'd worn that day. It was best people didn't see his cat side in public, so he normally tucked his tail into his jeans and wore hats to cover his ears. It was uncomfortable, to he let his tail out at work, and he was going to do the same with the beanie until he saw Gavin. A stranger whose views on Hybrids he had no idea of. 

Sure, Geoff was part monkey, himself, but he'd thought maybe Gavin just tolerated it. That was this morning though, and Michael felt he knew Gavin well enough to take off his beanie around him, letting out a groan as he scratched and rubbed his ears. It felt like heaven to stretch them out again after spending all day with them folded into his hat. It'd made hearing a bit hard, but it'd seemed worth it at the time.

"Why'd you hide your ears all day, Michael? They're lovely." Gavin cooed once Michael was done with his little massage. The question caught him off guard, so Michael just shrugged, fighting back the urge to blush as his tail thumped once against the chair.

"Rooster Teeth might be a place where Hybrids can work, but it doesn't mean everyone is happy about us being here. I didn't know you. I thought maybe you would be a dick if I just strutted around with my ears and tail out all day. I know Geoff does it, but I still couldn't be sure how you'd react." He answered coughing as he turned his attention back to the computer, feeling awkward and tense about how Gavin would react.

"You... Thought I wouldn't like you because of it?" The Brit asked tentatively after a moment of thought, bringing Michael's attention back to him as he gave another shrug, his purring tapering off into silence after a beat. "Oh, my silly Michael! That stuff doesn't matter to me, if it did I wouldn't be such great friends with Geoff and Griffon. In fact, its actually kind of a thing for me... I mean I've never done that much with anyone since I haven't found my soulmate yet, but I think I prefer Hybrids, they're much more fun."

That comment ripped a growl from Michael, glaring at Gavin. "Oh, so we're just entertainment to you, then? A fetish to be ashamed of?" He said heatedly, crossing his arms over his chest. He'd thought Gavin was different, but it was just insulting the way he'd just explained it to Michael.

"No!" Gavin exclaimed quickly, rushing to correct himself while Michael still glared, "I mean yeah, I find the ears and tails to be hot, even the bloody wings, but its not a fetish. I like humans, I like Hybrids. Its that simple. I have a preference for Hybrids because honestly animal instinct can be hot, but I wouldn't... Bollocks, I wouldn't just love someone because of what they are. Like I wouldn't be sad if my soulmate was a human, that'd be horrible. I'd love my soulmate no matter what, because that's what I'm supposed to do."

Michael managed to calm himself down once he realised Gavin hadn't meant offense, his tail still twitching with anxiousness as he looked Gavin over and decided to change the topic. Gavin meant well. 

"So... You believe in soulmate stuff then?" He slipped in after a few beats of awkward silence between them. He was still miles away from actually liking Gavin, let alone having feelings for him, but the name on his thigh... Gavin hadn't said anything, so Michael had just pushed it aside and figured he wasn't the Gavin with his name on him. Even if he was, it wouldn't change anything, Gavin was an idiot at best and Michael still couldn't believe in his mark.

"Don't you?" Gavin asked, frowning just a bit, tilting his head like he was trying to figure out Michael.

"I mean, not really... It kind of just seems like a scam, you know? It doesn't make sense to me that some fucking ink on your body is able to tell you the person who's perfect for you. Especially since its on you at birth." Michael shrugged, reaching over to grab his red bull from the other side of his desk and down it so he didn't have to focus as much on Gavin's reaction.

He did notice the funny look the Brit gave him, however. "You're an interesting one, Michael, but alright. If you believe that then its your opinion. Personally I can't wait to meet my soulmate, I know I'll fall in love instantly, no matter who they are." He said, puffing out his chest a bit proudly and grinning at Michael.

"Now that's just dumb," Michael sighed, rolling his eyes when Gavin visibly deflated, "what a load of bullshit, Gav, honestly. You're gonna fall in love with them as soon as you know who they are? That's not how things work, asshole. A name shouldn't tell you who to love, you should fall in love because you actually know someone, you know what they've been through, what they're like, their favourite things, shit like that. You shouldn't fall in love with someone because they have your name on them and you have theirs. You fall in love with a person, not a name."

Gavin just stared at him as Michael began getting up, gathering his things so he could go home. He could barely stand people who thought like Gavin, he thought they were idiots for trusting something blindly like that with something as serious as love. He didn't dislike Gavin, but if this was what he was like, it meant they really couldn't be soulmates. Someone like that wouldn't be perfect for Michael.

"You really are interesting, Michael," Gavin said, just as he'd gathered up all his things, making him stop in his tracks, "and in a way, I suppose you're right. Its just too bloody sad to think these names are pointless though, right? Let me have some hope. I won't fall in love with a name, I fully intend to fall in love with the person behind it, but I'm pretty sure I'll at least be attracted to my soulmate when I meet them, if I don't fall in love."

Michael frowned and shrugged, slinging his backpack over his shoulder as he thought about what Gavin had said. "I suppose you're right in a way, too." He replied simply, giving a small smile as he walked to the door, glad they were the last ones there, since he wouldn't have wanted anyone else to hear that conversation, really.

"Michael?" The Brit spoke up, just as he'd opened the door, forcing him to turn around and acknowledge him, his hand still holding onto the door. "What's your last name?" He asked, the question so soft and sincere that Michael could swear his heart stopped for a moment. Gavin looked curious, but more than anything, concerned.

"Jones," Michael answered, keeping his face blank as he tried to watch for Gavin's reaction. The man just kept his worried expression before turning back to his computer. "goodbye, Gavin."

He shut the door behind him with a resounding click and his mind raced a mile a minute.

 

* * *

 

 

He's not sure how he got home that night, he'd gone straight to a bar and drank about as much as the bartender would sell him, telling himself it couldn't be possible this was the Gavin who's name he had on his thigh. It _was_ impossible, right?

Michael woke up on his couch with a pounding headache, an empty bottle about to slip from his fingers and drop onto his carpet. He groaned and let it fall, reaching up to push his sweaty fringe from his forehead, pulling at his shirt to cool himself down a bit. He was sweating up a storm and felt like death.

Maybe he'd been a bit dramatic, after all he knew he had to go to work the next day, but the idea of actually knowing his soulmate was a rather scary thing, especially when the person was  _Gavin._ The guy had wrecked his desk twice in one day! How was he supposed to be Michael's soulmate?

No, it was a coincidence is all. Just because his name was Gavin Free and he'd asked Michael's last name didn't mean he was the Gavin Michael had. If he was, then Michael was sure the soulmate thing really was just a sham, there was no way someone like him would be perfect for him.

Regardless of any turmoil he had going on in his head though, he still had to force himself to get up and go to work, chugging down a mix of aspirin and redbull before stepping into the shower. He let the warm water roll of his back and through his hair, relaxing into it like he was getting a massage.

His thoughts turned to Gavin and that stupid grin of his, his ridiculous nose, his surprisingly pretty eyes. The moment his thoughts turned to that man, Michael was fucked. The shower was where he normally got off most mornings, it was just easier and calmer, so his body reacted instinctively. At least, that's what he told himself.

That's what he told himself when his fingers gripped around his hardening length, still slightly covered in soap bubbles from where he'd been cleaning himself earlier. That's what he told himself as he thought of Gavin's lips, and how pretty they would look stretched around his cock. That's what he told himself as he stroked himself with a steady rhythm, his head falling back against the bathroom tiles while he squeezed his eyes shut with shame. That's what he told himself as he stumbled through his orgasm, his fingers shaking, hips bucking and a certain British name falling from his lips.

That's what he told himself as he finished his shower and dried off. Its what he told himself as he got dressed and made himself some coffee. Its what he fucking told himself as he drove to work, stuck in traffic because he'd taken too long in the shower and left just to his thoughts.

His body had just reacted because he was in the shower, that was all, nothing more. He just needed to get off and even though he hated admitting it, Gavin was attractive. His mind had just picked someone randomly.

After waiting in traffic for what seemed like forever, Michael finally made it to the office. He was pulling off his beanie when Gavin came in, shooting him a sour look when he watched Michael pull his tail out as well. It seemed Gavin had been telling truth before, he really did have a thing for Michael's cat side. At the same time that it was disturbing, Michael felt flattered. Everyone he'd met had just put up with him as a Hybrid, but with Gavin he didn't have to worry about it.

"Morning lovely Michael." Gavin just grinned, reaching over to ruffle Michael's curls before walking to their section of the office. Michael watched him go with a frown and slightly pink cheeks, rubbing his ears where they'd been pressed down.

They were still sore from yesterday, just another thing dampening his mood. He didn't normally have to wear a beanie so long and the extra time he'd spent i traffic that morning hadn't helped them, either. He only did it to avoid assholes that would fuck with his car if they saw him from the street. It'd happened before when he'd first moved, just a few rotten eggs smashed around his car at work while it sat in the sun, nothing major, but it made him cautious.

Michael eventually just sighed and followed Gavin into their small office, sitting down at his desk and asking Geoff if they had anything planned for that day besides editing.

"Just a guide with Jack for today, Mikey. He'll tell you what to do." Geoff had answered, focused on something already on his computer.

He tried not to feel disappointed that he was paired with Jack and not Gavin, but failed pretty miserably. Still, he forced himself to pull a chair next to Jack when he was called over, only looking back at Gavin once. He looked to be pretty stuck into editing something already, headphones plugged in while he listened. It was the most serious Michael had seen him since he met him. Maybe he'd gotten the wrong impression off the Brit.

One of the first thoughts he'd had of Gavin was that he was going to be an unprofessional fuck that would be difficult to work with. He wasn't so far off about being hard to work with, but maybe it was just Michael that brought out such a side from him. Just thinking it made him bristle halfway through the video, his tail knocking against his chair noisily.

"You alright?" Jack asked, switching off the audio for a moment. "You seem a bit... Distracted today."

Michael shrugged, trying to push the attention off him as he stood up. "Fine, Jack. Just feeling a bit restless today, you know? I had redbull _and_ coffee this morning, so I have energy to burn, I guess. Didn't fucking help sitting stiff in traffic this morning, it was a bitch. Anyways I gotta use the bathroom, be right back."

 _Excuses, excuses._ He thought bitterly as he pushed into the bathroom down the hall.  _Gavin is totally fucking you up, you moron. Why are you letting him do this to you? You don't even know him, stop being stupid, this is work. Don't fuck this up, Michael._

He knew all of it was true, he couldn't afford to let Gavin screw up all his hard work. So, he splashed some water on his face once he'd used the toilet - because he wasn't that stupid, Geoff would probably murder him if he went to the bathroom twice in one hour - and went back into the office to record with Jack again.

What he found, though, was not the office he'd left just minutes ago. Michael's desk was ruined again, but this time so was Gavin's and Geoff's. Said two were rolling on the floor, gripping at the other to try and pin them into the floor while Jack recorded from his desk.

"What the fuck?" Michael shouted as he stepped over his boss and Gavin, bending down to pick up his things from the floor once again. "Look at all my stuff you morons, be careful. Its fucking expensive equipment." He felt himself smiling despite his annoyance when Gavin squawked and tried to grip at his ankle.

"Help me, Michael! Geoffers has gone mad!" The Brit yelled, struggling when Geoff grabbed him in a headlock.

"Its your own fault, fuck face, you're the one who kept throwing shit at me while I was trying to concentrate." Geoff grinned, mussing up Gavin's hair even more before finally letting Gavin go when he started to go red.

Gavin scrambled back to his chair with a grin and gave Michael a cheeky smirk as he started grabbing his things off the floor. "Idiot," he said with a roll of his eyes before bending down to clean the mess up with him, "second day in a row where you fucked up my shit. I think you owe me a  _meal_  for this."

"Are you asking me out, Michael?" Gavin's smirk only grew, making the other man bristle and turn pink.

"That's not what I meant, asshole." He grunted, chucking his things down on his desk to clean up later before moving back next to Jack.

Things went back to quiet after that, though Gavin insisted on sending him smiles for the rest of the day, looking over at him every few minutes. It pissed Michael off, but he didn't say anything about it. Gavin would just be Gavin, so he knew he wouldn't get a serious answer out of him. Even if he did, it would be something stupid.

When the end of the day came, Michael decided to leave first, already done with his work for the day. As soon as he was out of the door he was tugging his beanie back on and stuffing his tail into his jeans, jumping practically a foot in the air when he felt a tap on his shoulder.

"Sorry," The person said, sounding very not sorry at all. Sure enough, when he turned around he was faced with Gavin wearing a smirk that could rival Geoff's, "figured your cat instincts would have warned you I was coming."

"Doesn't work like that, Gav," Michael replied with a roll of his eyes, "besides, my ears were in my beanie, it limits my hearing jut a bit."

Gavin continued to smirk and reached out to tuck the rest of his tail into his pants, sending a shiver through Michael. The stupid prick had scared him before he could finish. "I don't know why you hide it, lovely little Michael. I would cherish your cat side."

Michael gave him a pointed look and tried not to laugh. "I'm seriously starting to think you're into bestiality or some shit, dude," he teased, adjusting his beanie before starting to walk towards the door, "I'm guessing you came to tell me you're leaving as well, you want a ride? You still owe me a meal." He said, holding the door open for Gavin, who was still halfway down the hallway with a look on his face that said he had wanted to talk about something else with Michael. If it was what the Jersey man thought it was, then he really wanted to get out of the office before Gavin could say anything.

"I still think you're asking me out to a date, Michael." Gavin sighed, but smiled as he went back to grab his bag.

"Yeah, in your fucking dreams, dickhead." Michael said affectionately, unable to stop a grin from forming as he walked Gavin out to his car. He had to admit the guy was fun to hang out with, at least.

It was all kinds of fucked up and confusing what they had, Michael didn't even know if they were soulmates, but he figured if he pretended Gavin wasn't then the Brit wouldn't fall for him. He was the type to fall for a name and Michael wouldn't let that happen. He'd seen it happen too many times, people falling in love simply because they'd found their 'soulmate', even though they would never even like each other if it wasn't for the names. Even worse, with some Hybrids he'd heard of, they'd gotten paired with assholes who wanted them to hide their animal parts. Of course, the Hybrids would agree because they were so stupidly in love.

Michael wouldn't let that happen to himself. Even though Gavin seemed to love that he was a half, he refused to let himself be some kink, some _thing_ to play with. So he told himself over and over that it wasn't likely Gavin was his soulmates, no matter how many signs there were. It made it easier to pretend like nothing was wrong when everything was _so fucking wrong_.

He drove in practical silence on the way to his apartment, figuring they could just order takeout since Gavin didn't seem like the kind of guy who carried around enough money to pay for a fancy restaurant. His suspicions were confirmed when they got inside and Michael suggested Chinese. Gavin had seemed relieved at being given a cheap option.

"Didn't figure you to be the type to be as easy as Chinese." The Brit teased as he flopped down onto Michael's couch, settling himself into a comfortable position.

"Shut the fuck up, prick. Your broke ass couldn't afford what I normally get." He said with a grin, shoving Gavin's feet out of his spot and reaching over to grab his controllers off the coffee table.

"I suppose I deserved that," Gavin chuckled, putting his feet straight into Michael's lap once he had his controller. Michael rolled his eyes but left them there anyway, it felt kind of nice, "anyway, what are we playing, boi?"

Michael raised an eyebrow at the term, but turned on his TV without question. "Whatever I've got in _boi_." He mumbled teasingly, pressing a button on his controller to turn it on. The last game he'd played turned out to be Borderlands, so they played for about an hour before Michael paused the game to order their food. About twenty minutes of waiting later, it was delivered. Gavin paid for it while Michael found something half decent to watch while they ate. He ended up deciding to just randomly grab something and chuck it into his DVD player.

Nearly two hours later, empty containers lay scattered over the coffee table, Michael's limbs tangled with Gavin's as they both mumbled tiredly to each other. The movie had finished long ago, but Michael didn't want to get up, he was far too comfortable lying with Gavin. It just felt right, in some weird way.

Then, Gavin's hand started absentmindedly stroking Michael's tail, pulling a violent shiver from the man at how nice it felt. His tail had always been so sensitive, and it was nice to have a friend like Gavin be so interested in his cat half. He stilled whacked Gavin's hand with his tail and grinned, though, no matter how nice it felt.

"I'm gonna go to bed, I think. We're getting fucking loopy." Michael sighed, standing up and groaning when he heard a pop from his back as he stretched. His couch really wasn't good for his back.

"You're not gonna drive me home, boi?" A British voice called just as Michael had started heading for his room. He turned around and scratched his ears with a frown.

"You can stay, if you want. I mean, if you wanna go home, I'll drive you, but I can't guarantee I won't fall asleep at the wheel and kill us both." He grinned, watching Gavin to figure out what he was thinking, but he couldn't tell. The guy was good at hiding stuff like that.

"Top, I'll just text Geoff and then I'll come join you." Gavin replied with his own grin, reaching out for his phone on the coffee table.

Michael stared at him for a moment before laughing. "You're a fucking idiot," he mumbled with a roll of his eyes, padding over to one of his cupboards to grab out one of his old blankets, "like hell you're sharing my bed, dude. You're on the fucking couch, otherwise you'd probably push me off the bed in your sleep." He continued, chucking the blanket next to Gavin who squawked Michael's name and pouted.

He didn't look back as he walked into his room.

He heard Gavin make a call before the lights turned off outside his room and everything went quiet. Michael got changed out of his clothes into some pajama bottoms after brushing his teeth and crawled under his covers to go to sleep.

Turns out his body had other plans. He was suddenly wide awake, alert for some reason. No matter what he did, he just couldn't get back into sleep mode. He'd been fine next to Gavin watching TV, it had felt so normal and relaxing. He tossed and turned for twenty more minutes after realising his problem, before deciding fuck it and reaching over to grab his phone. He didn't even get to unlock it before there was a soft knock at his door and an even more soft 'Michael?' uttered through it.

"Get in here." He grumbled, turning on his side to face the door as it opened. Gavin shut the door quietly behind him and moved quickly to get under the covers next to Michael.

"Thanks, boi." The Brit whispered, cuddling up to Michael and just making him even more aware than before. When they'd been on the couch, everything was simple, it was just more comfortable in a cramped space to end up touching each other, but now there was no excuse and he knew it.

"Call me boi again and I'll break your face." He said without any real bite to it, deciding to just loop his arm around Gavin's waist and think about it in the morning. Sleep was more important.

"You love it."

"Fuck you."

"When and where, _boi?_ "

"Fucking sleep, moron."

 

* * *

 

Things only escalated from that point, Gavin staying over Michael's house nearly every day for a week. Michael had started doing his fucking _laundry._ He didn't complain because he didn't actually care, but the point was that things seemed to be moving toward the romantic side of things and Michael wasn't sure he was opposed to the idea anymore.

The more time he spent with Gavin, the more he liked him, the deeper their connection became. They couldn't even sleep alone when the other was in the same vicinity anymore. At least Michael kept some of his dignity, Gavin would wait at least half an hour on the couch before stumbling his way into Michael's room - and arms- to fall asleep. It was an unspoken thing between them by that point, even though Michael desperately thought up ways to bring it up, he couldn't seem to find something that wasn't just plain awkward. How were you even supposed to ask something like that?

He wasn't going to embarrass himself, not when things could so easily be platonic on Gavin's end. It didn't matter how much the man flirted, Michael couldn't let himself get attached, he couldn't risk the chance of getting hurt. Maybe that made him a coward. Did it? He didn't fucking care, in any place, if he was a coward for trying to protect himself, then so be it. Michael would figure this out, he would stop the feelings, he would go back to normal or die trying. Everything had been fine before Gavin came and ruined it all, the hard work he'd spent years doing, the money invested, the emotion, everything he'd put into getting the fuck out of Jersey seemed like shit now, but he wouldn't take it back for even a second.

Gavin had fucked everything up, but maybe he liked things that way. When it was certain stupid British assholes wrecking things, it didn't seem so bad, he wasn't so angry anymore. He had his fake rage, his joke rage, but he had no real rage like he used to, Gavin always knew how to make him laugh, somehow.

 _I'm a fucking girl._ Michael nearly yelled inside his mind, his hands gripping onto his steering wheel with a death grip as he sat stuck in traffic again. He hadn't been able to sleep without Gavin beside him the previous night, so he'd slept in yet again and it was fucking with him.  _Now I can't even sleep by myself? What is this, a sitcom?_

All his thoughts were becoming jumbled and confused with the lack of rest, but Michael still pushed through the morning rush, praying to whoever the fuck was in charge of everything that he would get to work on time. He refused to be late again after only a week because of Gavin. What was worse was that with this extra time, his thoughts were left to wander back to him every time Michael had thought he'd shaken it out of himself.

He was like a lovesick puppy, it was disgusting. Every time he saw a couple kissing, he imagined Gavin's lips and how soft they looked, every time he saw two people holding hands, he thought about how nice and warm Gavin's hands looked, and how they could so easily fit into Michael's. He was a fucking idiot for even thinking it, but Gavin really was growing on him.

So, all he did was laugh when the Brit tackled him the moment he stepped foot in the Rooster Teeth office. Gavin nearly sent them to the ground, but Michael managed to wrap an arm around his waist and steady them in time.

"I missed you my little Michael!" He chirped as soon as his feet touched the ground again. It'd been hard lifting him up, since the other man was actually taller than him, but it was worth it for the noises Gavin made.

"You spent one night at the place you _live_ , idiot." Michael teased, though he was glad Gavin shared the sentiment.

"I know, but you don't know how hard it is to sleep alone now. I like your place much better." Gavin pouted, grabbing the beanie off Michael's head for him as he un-tucked his tail. Michael couldn't help but grin when he tugged the hat straight on. It really suited him.

"My place is shit, you're a moron," he rolled his eyes, reaching to fix the beanie where Gavin had put it on crooked, "anyway, you wanna go out tonight, boi? We can go to a bar or something, if you want. I feel like getting drunk and its the weekend tomorrow so we won't have to worry about going in with a hangover."

Gavin grinned excitedly as they entered the Achievement Hunter office, practically jumping into his seat and swinging around to face Michael. "We gonna get bevved up, Michael? Maybe we can go on the pull, yeah? I haven't gotten laid in  _ages._ " He groaned like he was in pain at the idea, but was still smiling as Michael settled himself at his own desk.

"Go on the pull? I swear you make shit up sometimes, Gav. But if you want me to be your wingman, forget it. I can't do anything that would get somebody past that nose of yours." He joked, though feeling some sting at the fact that Gavin would suggest they go looking to hook up with other people. They weren't even close to being anything, but he thought maybe Gavin felt something for him. It was just a nail in the coffin though, now he really wasn't going to share his feelings with him.

Nevertheless they still went out like planned after work, Michael a little sour, but hoping he could distract Gavin for long enough that he would forget about fucking anyone else. It didn't take long for him to realise that plan was a bust.

"Dude, pay attention, I'm telling you a hilarious story!" Michael laughed over the loud music of the bar, shoving Gavin's shoulder lightly and feeling his heart skip a beat when he was given a goofy grin in return.

"Sorry, Michael. I'm on the hunt tonight, I don't think I'll be paying much attention to anything to be honest. I must be bloody rusty though, haven't tried to get with anyone since I came back to America." Gavin said, his gaze lingering in one area where he'd obviously set his sights on someone.

"Seriously? That's a fucking long time," he teased, downing the rest of his drink to gain courage for what he was about to suggest, "why don't you just practise on me?"

Gavin spluttered and coughed up the drink he'd just been sipping from. " _Excuse me_?"

"Don't be a baby," Michael said, rolling his eyes at Gavin and nudging his foot, "you're rusty, so practise on me. I'll tell you if you're being a fucking moron, then you won't fuck up when it matters."

He was playing a dangerous game with Gavin, but he was just buzzed enough that all he was thinking about was pulling Gavin into his lap and kissing him until he couldn't breathe. His self control was out of the window and it wasn't a good thing. "Are you havin' a laugh, Michael?" The other asked after a moment, frowning as he tried to tell whether Michael was being serious or if he was drunk off his ass.

"'Are you 'avin a laugh Micool?' you fucking moron, I'm being serious. If you can get me to wanna fuck you then I guarantee anyone in this damn place will be all over you." He mocked, waving over one of the workers to order another drink. 

"I'm taking that as a challenge, boi!" Gavin exclaimed, his goofy grin back and as stupid as ever. "Hey, you know you're looking pretty god tonight, my little Michael. I might end up just taking you home instead."

It was said so seductively that Michael almost fell for it, his heart skipping a beat at the soft tone. He snapped himself out of it before he could look too dazed, barking out a laugh at how stupid it had sounded. "Oh man,  _you_ ," he punctuated the word with a finger poked into the middle of Gavin's chest, "are really fucking rusty, absolutely hopeless. As if I would fall for that." He grinned, wanting to laugh even harder at the pout that formed on Gavin.

"Well its bloody hard, innit'? We were just talking about it, how am I supposed to fool you? I bet you couldn't do any better." Gavin huffed, downing the rest of his drink as well.

Michael raised an eyebrow at Gavin, taking his words as a challenge. He didn't back down from challenges, ever.

So, he moved himself into Gavin's space, a slight smirk playing on his lips as he gripped his palm to Gavin's thigh. "Wanna bet? Baby I could do so many things to you that you would beg me to take you home," he whispered right near Gavin's ear, making sure to purr slightly and let his words fall like silk from his tongue. "and you know I'd treat you so well when we got there... I'd spread you wide open and fuck you good, like you deserve." He mumbled, lips brushing ever so slightly against Gavin's neck before there was a moment where he swore the Brit went limp against him.

That moment was short lived as Gavin snapped back into reality. He jumped away from Michael, pink around the ears as he slid out of his chair. Michael just frowned at him, one eyebrow raised again at how weird Gavin was behaving. He had some weird thing about his neck, but Michael didn't want to push it.

"Alright, alright you win. You didn't have to go that far to prove a point," He chuckled a little nervously, avoiding eye contact with Michael. It just made him more suspicious. "anyways lad, I've got my eyes on someone at the moment so I guess I'll see you tomorrow if things go well. Wish me luck."

He was gone before Michael could even stop him. He walked straight up to another Hybrid with horns quite like Kerry's. He hadn't talked to the guy much, but did know he was part bull even though he was quite possibly the most timid guy he'd ever met.

Gavin easily slipped into flirting mode, Michael watching from his seat with his new drink cradled in his hand like his life depended on it. His blood was boiling, bile rising to his throat. Gavin was  _his_ , this wasn't fair. Wasn't he the guy who was desperate to find his soulmate, anyway? What the fuck was he doing flirting with random strangers when Michael was right there? It was like a knife in the back, honestly.

Maybe he should have just fucking told him when he could have. Now things would be all kinds of fucked up and awkward. Gavin probably didn't even see him that way. He was too much of a pussy to ever ask, but Gavin just seemed so charming with everyone. He treated Michael the same, right? Besides, there was probably plenty of people who wanted to get into his pants, even if he wasn't their soulmate. Gavin was just like that, attractive without even trying. He could have anyone he wanted and that probably wasn't Michael.

Before he let his jealousy get the better of him, he tipped the rest of his drink back down into his mouth and paid the bill, refusing to look at Gavin. If he was gonna fuck someone else, Michael didn't want to see them leave together. He didn't want to see Gavin stare at the man adoringly, or like he wanted to fuck his brains out. That was one image Michael really didn't need in his memory at that moment.

Of course he could be replaced. Hybrids were just a fetish for Gavin, it didn't matter who it was, or what their other half was, the idiot was happy to fuck whoever would dominate him like an animal. Michael should have been disgusted with him, but all he felt was burning jealousy and the need to claim Gavin as his, just like his animal part would do. It was selfish of him to feel that way, really. He was the one who pushed Gavin away when things started heading in that direction. He'd probably cut Gavin off before he could even start developing feelings and now he'd completely fucked himself.

All he wanted was to waltz back in there, grab Gavin by the neck and kiss him until no one else would even _think_ of looking at him in the wrong way. He wanted to kick the shit out of anyone who dared touch him, because Gavin was _his_ , even if the Brit didn't know it. His instincts were telling him he should go back and do just that, but he ignored them in favor of walking home to clear his head. He had to much energy, his aggression and jealousy pouring off him in waves that would scare off anyone from even looking at him.

He was approached only halfway to his apartment.

"Hey pretty kitty, you look so stressed, don't you wanna have some fun?" A voice purred to him from the corner. It had a British accent to it that made Michael stop and stare. It was a man who looked older than him by a fair few years, tanned and a little bulky. He looked nothing like Gavin, but his voice was almost the exact same. Maybe could just listen to that voice and close his eyes?

The man seemed to be a prostitute anyway, maybe he wouldn't be offended if Michael closed his eyes during sex. He'd probably had weirder things happen. "Uh... Sure, how much?" Michael asked softly, walking up to the man while his face felt on fire. He could see a noticeable tattoo on his arm that read 'John Darcy Green' and almost backed out, before remembering that this man was probably only doing it for the money, which Michael happened to have and was willing to pay for someone with the same voice as Gavin.

"How about this, first time's free if you promise we'll have some fun again next time? Its not often I get such good looking customers." He said, ending with a little pout as he rubbed his hand along Michael's arm.

"You want to have a next time?" He asked, surprised. It wasn't often he found a human that didn't even seem to notice his animal side. Of course he'd seen Michael's ears and tail, but he acted like they weren't even there. It reminded him of how Gavin had been, meeting him. It was hard to tell, since Gavin had been caught up in all those wires, but there had been that first look at his tail that everyone did, only Gavin just went straight back to his face after that.

"If you treat me well." The man replied with a wink, still waiting with his hand around Michael's bicep.

It took only a few minutes before he decided fuck it, if Gavin was getting laid, then so was he. He could pretend he was fine and that he was with Gavin and everything would be fucking perfect for one night.

That's all he needed, one night. Just one night to get over all of this. He'd push down his feelings after, he'd make them go away before he got hurt.

So off they went, Michael hailing a cab so they didn't have to walk the rest of the way back. As soon as they set foot in his apartment, their lips were pressed together, the kiss a little too hard and heated, but Michael could distract himself by stripping them both. He's not sure how they ended up on the bed, all he could remember was leaving marks on the guy's neck and moaning Gavin's name as he fucked him into the bed.

It was probably the best sex he'd ever had, though he wasn't used to closing his eyes during it, at least he got off. At least he could let out all the frustration that had been pent up because of Gavin.

Stupid British prick with his stupid pretty mouth. Fuck, what he could do with that mouth. He'd get Gavin on his knees and stretch those lips wide for him, he'd fucking claim him, own him.

Gavin would be _his_.

But it was only a dream. Gavin would never be his, not like that.

So, he fucked the prostitute and stared at the ceiling after he was done. The man had fallen asleep and all he could think about was how Gavin was doing, was he being fucked by that disgusting prick at the bar? Did he enjoy it? Did he even think about Michael when it happened? 

Eventually he sighed and rolled over so he could curl into a sort of ball, feeling more empty than ever, heartbroken over a stupid, gorgeous man who he shouldn't love at all, but did.

He fell asleep when the sun started to rise.

When he woke, the bed was empty and he had a weight in his chest that felt like lead. He was completely alone.

 

* * *

 

Michael was glad it was Saturday. The last thing he wanted to do was go into work, he just wanted to mope and try to sleep off the weight that was still in his chest. He'd liked sleeping with the prostitute more than he should have, mainly because he sounded so closely to Gavin, and it was tearing him up.

He hadn't exactly promised to go back, but he was conflicted, still. He felt like it was a kind of betrayal towards Gavin, sleeping with someone else, despite the fact that they weren't together. Yet, it really had been the best sex he'd had, probably because he was so intensely listening to the moans he could imagine Gavin making. He fooled himself into actually thinking it was him, a little. He wanted that again, even if he had to pay for it.

The doorbell of his apartment dinged just as he was about to fall asleep and Michael swore loudly as he went up to get it.

"What do you want?" He asked harshly as he opened the door, rubbing his eyes before slipping on his glasses. His whole demeanor changed when he saw Gavin standing in front of him.

"Michael! A bit hungover, are we? You haven't been answering my texts all morning, you must have had a lot to drink. I wouldn't know, you left before I could even pay the bill with you. You should have told me so I could have given you my half." The Brit said, walking straight in, past Michael like he owned the place. In a way, he kind of did.

"Didn't really wanna interrupt what you had going on, I guess." Michael shrugged, feeling awkward and guilty as he looked at Gavin. The guilt vanished when he saw bruises along his neck.

"Oh! Yeah, that reminds me, it went well, as you can probably tell. I feel so much better, boi. I was so pent up." Gavin grinned, laying himself down on Michael's couch and sighing with such content that Michael thought he was going to melt into the leather. He seemed a lot more relaxed than ever.

"Could have come to me, I would have helped you out." He mumbled before sitting down on his armchair, facing Gavin. It'd been almost a joke, but he'd said it with enough seriousness to make Gavin look at him curiously.

There was a moment of silence where they stared at each other and Michael felt the weight pressing against him harder than ever. "Michael-"

"Anyways," he said, cutting Gavin off before he could finish his thought, "we both got laid tonight so go us, right? Turns out there's more than one British fuck in this city who has a thing for Hybrids." He laughed, trying to make the mood light again. He just wanted things to be back to normal again. He wanted the weight gone.

Gavin gave him a smile that seemed just a little forced. "That's good for you, Michael. You deserve something like that."

Another moment of awkward silence.

"Do you want to play the new Halo?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a whole lot easier being in love when the other person returns it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lil bit of smut in this. Beware.

The prostitute's name was Felix.

Michael hadn't meant to get involved, hadn't meant to even go see the man again, but he'd found himself on that same path a few days after meeting him and he couldn't resist. It was ironic how the only reason he was on that same route again was because of Gavin. They'd gone back to the bar again just for drinks that time, but as Michael suspected, before they were even halfway through their drinks, Gavin was zoning in on someone.

Before he knew it, Gavin had ditched him for the stranger and Michael was left to wander home alone. His stomach topped up nicely with alcohol, Michael figured he'd try to sober up a bit with some fresh air. He'd passed the corner which he assumed Felix worked most nights when he heard his name called.

"I knew it was you," Felix said smugly when he turned around, "I had to do a double take since you hid away your kitty bits, but I thought you looked familiar. Why'd you walk past, handsome? Did you get shy?"

God, that accent, that teasing, flirty tone... It wasn't long before he had Felix back at his place, underneath him and making those noises Michael enjoyed so much. He'd forgotten how much he really sounded like Gavin.

He'd told the prostitute that he was just walking by, after, having not wanted to ruin their moment before it even began. Felix just laughed and said it was fine, curling into Michael's side and playing with his tail. It felt oddly nice for being with someone he was paying. Felix was no Gavin, but he was charming, funny and sure as hell attractive. Before Michael met Gavin, he might've been perfect for him.

Unfortunately, Gavin had spoiled him for anybody else.

So, Felix became like an addiction. Once wasn't enough to get him hooked, but by the second time he wanted more, wanted it all the time. He wanted to pretend he had Gavin.

It was probably a bit unhealthy how quickly he came to depend on Felix. He was paying almost every night to see him and they didn't even always have sex. Sometimes Michael liked to just lay with him and listen to him complain about all the sleazy customers he had to deal with.

One night they did both, Felix laying slightly against Michael's stomach and tracing Gavin's name on his thigh. Michael had shivered when he first touched it, but he soon grew used to the gentle touch, feeling quite relaxed by it.

"Is Gavin the reason you come to me?" The man asked after a few minutes of Michael's quiet purring, still tracing over the name and kissing his side.

"Yeah, its complicated," Michael whispered shakily, frowning a bit as he tangled his fingers in Felix's hair, "is that okay?"

Felix just smiled and nodded, moving to crawl back up Michael's body. "I don't judge any of my customers for their reasons, pretty kitty, even if they're gross." He said, leaning down to kiss Michael a few times.

"You know, you'd probably be perfect for me if it wasn't for the stupid soulmate thing." He sighed, giving Felix a sad smile before flipping them over and starting to kiss down his body.

Felix was a good guy, he deserved better than to have to be a prostitute, but Michael couldn't change that fact. He tried to treat him well instead, be someone that the man would have no reason to complain about.  

After the third week of seeing him almost every night, though, Felix let him know that he would be out of town for a few days, to visit some friends. Michael was upset, but he wasn't exactly going to go beg the guy to stay for his own selfish needs. He could survive on his own for a while. He hadn't become that dependent.

So, for a few nights he was left to himself and his thoughts. Only, it seemed that Gavin wanted to join in on the alone time and invited himself over to Michael's apartment.

"We haven't seen each other outside of works in weeks, boi! You've been so bloody busy." The man whined when Michael asked why. So, he rolled his eyes and let him in, feeling both amused and nervous as Gavin carried a large bottle into the kitchen. It looked suspiciously like Vodka.

"I had family stuff," Michael shrugged, blushing a bit at the weak lie. "you've been sleeping around anyway, like I needed to watch you make out with random people every night." He grumbled, hopping onto the bench and crossing his arms, his tail swishing behind him.

"I don't know why it bothers you so much." Gavin sighed, rifling through the drawers for the bottle opener. Michael's face burned and he frowned, reaching to grab it from the counter where Gavin hadn't noticed it.

"What are we doing anyways? Don't tell me we're drinking that bottle, that shit looks deathly and we both know you're a fucking lightweight." He said, kicking his legs a bit as he watched Gavin open the bottle.

"Its not that bad." Gavin shrugged, grabbing glasses for both of them and starting to pour the drink into it. Yeah, that was Vodka alright.

Michael scrunched his nose but took the glass Gavin handed to him, giving him a light tap with his foot when he sipped just to watch him cough and sputter out his drink. "Careful, dipshit," he teased, smirking as he downed his glass and set it on the counter, "mind telling me why you're really here now? And with a giant bottle of fucking Vodka?"

Gavin at least had the decency to look sheepish. "What, can't I just want to get a bit drunk with my boi?" He asked innocently, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand when he was done sipping his drink as well.

"Nope." Michael chirped, popping the 'p' and wiggling in his spot on the counter.

Normally he wouldn't even question the fact that Gavin wanted to have drinks with him - he was a borderline alcoholic, he swore - but there was just something different about Gavin that day. He had dark circles under his eyes, his hair was even messier than usual and his cheery attitude seemed a little too forced. Even his clothes were messy and didn't even match like usual. It was a little worrying.

"Its nothing for you to worry your pretty little head over, Michael. Can we just drink for a bit?" The Brit asked, looking tired as he gave him a sad smile. Michael found himself blushing over the pretty comment, but shrugged anyway, grabbing the bottle to pour himself another glass.

"You'd tell me if it was serious, right?" He simply said, feeling a bit self conscious as he hid behind his drink.

"Of course, boi." Gavin smiled, already back to being excited and happy. It settled some of Michael's nerves, but there was still a lingering feeling that something was wrong.

He shrugged it off, then they spent the next half hour drinking Vodka from their glasses until they decided to take turns just sipping from the bottle, too far past tipsy to care. Michael knew his throat would burn like a bitch in the morning and the vomit he'd throw up would just make it worse, but for that moment he was numb to anything, simply smiling and giggling with Gavin, almost falling off from his seat on the counter more than a few times. It was good to just hang out with Gavin again, he hated the coil of jealousy that rested in his stomach whenever they would go out to a bar and everyone would be looking at Gavin, touching Gavin, smiling, flirting.

Before he met Gavin, he wouldn't have thought he was a jealous person. At least, not to such a violent extent. For all his anger in his internet persona, the real Michael had almost none, he never got in fights or yelled that much when he wasn't being filmed, but whenever he saw someone with their hands all over his Gavin he just - fuck, he couldn't control himself.

It was probably dumb of him not to say anything to Gavin, but he could at least admit to himself that he was scared. Maybe he'd gotten everything wrong? Maybe Gavin wasn't his soulmate? Everything was so fucked up and confusing, he didn't even know who Gavin's soulmate was. He couldn't just ask him, Gavin would be curious, then he'd have to admit that the name on his thigh was Gavin's and he was pretty much in love with him.

Then what? If Gavin didn't have Michael's name, everything would go down the drain. Even if he did have Michael's name, that didn't mean Gavin had feelings for him. He wouldn't believe him if he said he did, after all Gavin was one of the people who thoroughly believed in the soulmate business, he'd even said that he'd fall in love with his soulmate as soon as he met them.

How could Michael trust that Gavin actually loved him, and not just the idea of him? Everyone got so caught up in soulmates that it just fucked everything up, it was why Michael couldn't believe in it. No matter his feelings, no matter the name, he wouldn't admit shit to Gavin.

Not even when he opened his eyes from a brief nap on the counter and found Gavin standing between his legs, all up in his space and staring intently at Michael. Fuck.

He didn't know how long he'd been out of it for, but Gavin had gotten off his place on the floor and had wobbily moved close to Michael, steadying himself by placing his hands on his thighs - and unconsciously spreading them just by leaning his weight on Michael.His heart was beating hard as Gavin inched closer, a slight purr escaping him as he wrapped his tail around himself for comfort. Was Gavin going to kiss him?

"You've got loads of lovely freckles, boi." The man cooed, reaching out to poke one on Michael's nose.

Oh.

He was just looking at his freckles, then. He couldn't help but feel a little disappointed, though he was also relieved at the same time. He felt himself give a little sigh as he loosely hooked an ankle around the back of Gavin's leg. "Only just noticing now?" He teased, giving a light giggle.

"I've always noticed. I never have the courage to tell you until I'm drunk," Gavin mumbled, his finger tracing invisible lines between his freckles until his hand came to rest against his jaw. "I'd very much like to kiss all of them."

Michael's world seemed to stop for a moment and he simply stared at Gavin with a dumb expression, far too intoxicated to process that properly. He didn't even have time to think about what Gavin had said, because the Brit was pulling away, Michael's foot slipping from him as he sat back on the floor and leant against one of the cupboards.

He watched as Gavin shut his eyes and eventually began to snore, wondering what the fuck had just happened.

Then, he hopped off the counter and leaned into the sink, heaving up the contents of his stomach.

 

* * *

 

At any rate, Gavin seemed to have forgotten he'd done anything out of the ordinary that night, moving sluggishly through his house in the morning to have a shower and make himself breakfast. Michael offered him some painkillers, earning a grateful smile from Gavin as they both ate small bites of their food. He honestly expected the man to be throwing up more, but he seemed pretty fine despite complaints about a headache and general queasiness.

He was gone by lunchtime though, back to Geoff's while Michael was left alone with his thoughts. He'd thought Gavin was going to kiss him and god, he'd loved the idea.

Michael had more than thought about Gavin kissing him before, he'd thought about a lot of things when it came to Gavin but actually being there, feeling his breath against his cheek, seeing his face pressing closer, his lips so close to touching his... It left him with a heavy bundle of nerves in his stomach, and he wasn't sure if he disliked them.

Needless to say he spent almost the entire day wrapped up in his thoughts, replaying that moment over in his mind and imagining Gavin had come just an inch closer to connect their lips. The thought made his heart skip a beat and his stomach tingle weirdly. He knew why, he'd felt it so many times before, but it was just so strong that he was worried.

He was in love with Gavin, that much was clear, but everything felt different. It was intense, the way his heart clenched and his brain got fuzzy when he thought about him. The adoration, the attachment to Gavin was blindingly strong although they'd only known each other for a short time. It made it clear to Michael that at the very least, Gavin was his soulmate. Even if he didn't return the feelings, Michael pretty much knew that he would never be able to let go of him. Not completely.

The realisation had him fleeing his apartment, storming down the warm, bustling streets of Austin as the sun started to set. With his hands shoved in his pockets, head down, ears covered by his beanie and his tail firmly tucked away; Michael went unnoticed by the crowds of people walking on the sidewalk. Nobody reached out to him, gave him pamphlets, asked him to try free samples. He was left alone, how he wanted it, but not how he liked it.

How he found himself on a bus, he didn't know. He also didn't know where said bus was going, but he rode it until the last stop, somewhere in downtown Austin he'd never visited. It wasn't a bad place, there wasn't a particular height in crime and the shops were mostly nice, it was simply that Michael hadn't had the time to explore the city to the edges like other people had.

After all, he'd been there just a few months.

He spent a good few hours wandering the streets, even after it had gotten dark he didn't feel like going home. The cool air felt ice against his skin and he could even make out a few stars in the sky which was quite rare for Austin. There weren't as many people around as it got later, no kids screaming and dragging their parents along to see whatever had excited them, no boring business men talking loudly on their cellphones on their way home. It was kind of quiet.

There was still the noise of traffic and bustling restaurants he passed, but it was the kind of background noise he could tune out. It was mostly just peaceful, he hadn't gone on a walk like that in a long time; one where he wasn't going anywhere, just wandering, passing people by who had lives of their own, problems of their own, different names engraved in their skin. He even passed by a few Hybrids like him, which was surprising, since he hadn't seen many at all since he moved.

They didn't even try to hide it, a woman with colourful wings stretched out behind her back proudly holding a man's hand who was covered in scales from head to toe. Granted, those weren't exactly the easiest things to hide, he would have even felt sorry for them if they hadn't been laughing and enjoying themselves as if they were just regular people.

He felt himself become envious, if only a little. They had the confidence to walk down the street, smiling and proudly holding hands like it was nothing. Like no one would dare say anything to them, and even if they did, they wouldn't care. He wished he held that sort of confidence in himself.

A few other Hybrids passed him by and he watched in a sort of wonder. Maybe downtown Austin was more accepting? Or perhaps that was just where a lot of Hybrids lived. Either way, he didn't care. He knew he definitely wanted to come back again sometime.

Unfortunately, it was getting close to midnight and Michael really didn't want to find out what it was like so late at night. He wandered until he came across a bus stop that would take him close to his apartment, then went home.

The bus ride back was quiet, filled with only an old lady who coughed every few moments and a teenage boy sitting near the back with an edgy hair cut and a sleeve of tattoos. When it came time for him to get off, he was almost reluctant to leave the peaceful setting behind. That feeling disappeared when he got back up to his apartment and sunk into his comfy couch with a can of redbull and Halo Reach set up on his TV.

He fell asleep sometime after the sun had risen, hands still clutching the controller as his head lulled forward.

Lips kissed up his thigh, teasing over his crotch as they stretched into a smirk. His pants were pulled down slowly, followed soon after by his boxers, the lips still stretched in that smirk as greenish eyes blinked up at him.

"Excited, Michael?" A voice purred silky and seductive as all hell, with an accent that made a purr rumble from Michael's chest. "Don't worry love, I'll take care of you." The voice continued, before a tongue poked out and swiped at the tip of his cock. He was becoming hard quickly, thrusting up into the mouth that now encased his head.

Michael shoved his hand into wild, dirty blonde hair, tugging and pushing to start a rhythm. He moaned softly, bucking up into the warm wetness, still unsatisfied even though the mouth was now wrapped fully around him.

"That's right, suck me like the bitch you are, Gav." He growled, his hand moving to the side of the Brit's neck as the mischievous glint in Gavin's eyes disappeared. Now he was focused on sucking Michael off, pleasuring him, making him cum. He was submissive and willing, just how Michael liked it.

Despite what people thought about hybrids, they weren't pliant fuck toys, Michael loved control and Gavin was easy.

He watched Gavin reach to start stroking himself as he sped up his bobbing, eager to get Michael to finish so he could to. It was hot, watching Gavin like that, he pulled him up by the scruff of his neck and kissed him hard, bucking up and grabbing both of their cocks with his free hand to rub them together. "Gavin." He moaned as he spurted all over his own stomach, said boy finishing soon after with a moan of Michael's name as well. He panted as they both came down from the high, nosing into Gavin's neck and kissing at it.

"I love you..."

Michael woke with a start, covered in sweat, among other things. He pressed his hand to his crotch for a moment and winced, feeling how sensitive it was.

"Fuck." He groaned, leaning back against the couch and covering his face with his arm.

 

* * *

 

The dream didn't leave his mind the next week at work, his eyes drifting to Gavin's lips almost every time they talked. It sucked, remembering the dream every time he even looked at Gavin, feeling his cock give a slight twitch at the thought of what those lips could do. Even if it was just a dream, it had certainly felt real enough to leave an impact on him and his body.

Gavin, the oblivious idiot that he was, thankfully didn't seem to notice anything wrong. Maybe he was just putting on a brave face for Michael, and he was actually weirded out by all of it, but the guy just didn't seem smart enough for that. Gav was the type to wear his heart on his sleeve. He had to admit to feeling a bit embarrassed for even knowing that.

They were close after just a short amount of time, but Gavin still had a little bit of trouble reading Michael, so even when he saw things were off, he still didn't understand why, and that was good enough for him. As long as Gavin didn't remember, everything was okay. If Gavin remembered, then that meant he was purposefully avoiding the conversation. That would mean he regretted getting close to Michael in the first place and that just wasn't something he could even think about.

Days went by like that, Michael deflecting everyone's concern for him, avoiding Gavin's eyes and trying to put a subtle distance between them so he could fucking breathe again. What the hell was with that, anyway? Was that an effect all soulmates had on each other, or was it just Gavin who made it hard for him to function properly?

The further he got away from Gavin, the easier and harder things got. It got easier to push the emotions away for sure, but it got a hell of a lot harder to want to. He was fucking addicted to Gavin, he knew he was, it was crazy and scary but the truth all the same. Gavin was a drug, and the further he got away, certainly the easier it got not to go back, but the want only increased.

There wasn't really a way to explain it properly. It was like exercising; the longer you do something, the easier it would become to do it. You go on auto-pilot, muscle memory, going through the motions or whatever the fuck else you wanted to call it. The flip side was the less you wanted to. It got less and less worth it, you got tired and bored and emotional so you stop. You might come back in a month but you're stuck back at square one all over again and it makes you feel even worse for indulging in laziness for that short while.

But Michael was rambling with his thoughts again, point was that things were confusing and having Gavin look at him like a lost puppy wasn't making it any easier. It wasn't lie Michael wanted it either! He just fucking wanted to save himself the trouble of getting hurt while Gavin mourned for all the work he had done to get so close to Michael.

He was allowed down that road for all of four days before Gavin approached him, a weird, sad look in his eyes and a carefulness to his step that Michael hadn't seen before. He was nervous, or maybe even scared coming to Michael after all that had happened in the past few days. The thought made bile rise to the back of his throat and Michael swallowed as he stared up at Gavin from his spot in his office chair.

"Michael?" He said, and god if his heart didn't break with just that simple utter of his name. Its the way Gavin said it; hesitant and soft, not at all in the annoyingly endearing way the Jersey man had become accustomed to.

"What?" He asked gruffly even though he didn't want his voice to come out so harsh and cranky. He had to force it out that way while his mouth threatened to turn it soft as butter and silky as velvet, filled with the emotion he was really feeling. None of this made sense, he should have just let things go on even if it would hurt when Gavin ended up denying his claims of them being soulmates. But he couldn't, he was weak and wanted to protect himself from that specific hurt.

Pushing Gavin away was selfish, but he figured he could afford this. He'd been good his whole life, right? He could get away with being selfish just this once.

Well, maybe he'd been selfish before, but that was besides the point, really.

"I haven't done anything, have I Michael? Like when we got drunk last weekend? I don't remember anything, so if I offended you, you have to know I didn't mean it." Gavin rambled, playing with his fingers nervously and shifting from foot to foot.

"Nah, Gavin. Everything's fine," Michael answered, turning back to his computer so he didn't have to look at Gavin again, "now go back to your work, I'm busy."

"I have done something then," Gavin said after a moment, stepping closer to Michael and frowning sadly, "look, if I made a move on you Michael, you have to know I was drunk, okay? So I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable or whatever, but we can get past this. Friends have these moments all the time, right?"

Gavin was pleading with him and it made Michael's blood boil. "Oh of course I fucking know you were drunk," he started, turning to Gavin with a scowl, "I fucking know it, jackass. You woke up the next day like nothing happened and you know what? It doesn't even matter because it wasn't anything anyway. It was just my imagination. We're fine, Gavin, so don't fucking flatter yourself by thinking that you're that important to me."

Before Gavin could even think of a response, Michael was up and out of the room, stomping out into the parking lot to get some air. Without even thinking, he was walking back to his apartment, shoving his beanie on and stuffing his tail into his jeans so he didn't have to worry about anyone saying anything. He needed a beer.

He slammed the door to his apartment closed as he stomped inside, ripping off the beanie and just kicking off his clothes because he couldn't be bothered with them anymore. His phone buzzed and Michael ignored it when it started to ring, throwing it onto his bed before walking back into the living room and slumping down on the couch.

Things with Gavin were always hard, he knew that, but this was just ridiculous. He felt like he was in some crappy soap opera and he was dancing around his love interest, trying to find out if the person really was his soulmate.Things weren't supposed to be so dramatic in real life, you find your soulmate and fall in love; simple. He'd never believed in any of that stuff to begin with, but at that point he'd give anything for it to be so easy.

He got the fall in love part right, it was just everything else that was muddled up.

Gavin was the idiot who just couldn't see that, couldn't see any of it. The only thing Michael could say for him was that he was damn persistent. Even from his spot in the lounge room he could hear his phone buzzing and ringing almost constantly. It was only a little endearing.

By the time he actually managed to pull himself up from his spot on the couch, the phone had stopped quite a while ago. He tried not to feel disappointed. That became certainly easier when he picked up his phone and saw over 60 notifications - all from Gavin, of fucking course. He sighed and cleared his notifications before plugging his phone in to charge and falling back into his bed.

What a mess.

 

* * *

 

Turned out that Gavin really wasn't one to let things slide.

The next morning, Michael was so rudely awoken from his lovely sleep to a loud, obnoxious banging at his door. When it didn't stop for a whole thirty seconds, he decided he'd better get up so the idiot trying to break his door down didn't make his neighbors complain about him. He'd already had noise complaints before from recording.

As he was about to open the door and yell at the person behind it, the knocking stopped and he heard a soft sigh. "Michael, I know you're there. Open the door and stop avoiding me."

He considered leaving Gavin at his door to fend for himself against his neighbors.

Unfortunately he was weak against the idiot and decided against his better judgement to let him in. "I'm not avoiding you." Was the first thing he said to him in return, glaring at the ground as he walked back through the hallway into his living room.

"Well that's bollocks and you know it," Gavin huffed, making himself home on Michael's couch and giving him a look he couldn't quite figure out. "I know now that I did something when I was drunk, but I don't exactly know what. So spill it Michael, what did I do to offend you?"

"You didn't." Michael rolled his eyes, standing in front of Gavin with his arms crossed and wondering how anyone could be so relaxed in the middle of an argument.

"Didn't what?"

"Offend me. You didn't offend me, idiot, I'm not some teenage girl who couldn't handle you- look, it doesn't matter. I'm fine, it’s over, I get it. Can we please just move on from this? I'm not mad at you, promise. Well, maybe I'm a little annoyed that you almost broke my door down at what, six in the morning? I mean jesus, what are you even doing up right now?"

Gavin just shrugged and smiled sheepishly. "Couldn't sleep," he said, sitting up properly for a moment and looking at Michael, "and maybe you're not mad, but there's something. Something that you're pushing me away for and I can't remember it but it must have been something for you to be reacting like this, right?"

"Maybe I'm trying to save you the embarrassment from knowing," Michael snapped, "as soon as I told you, you'd gag or make excuses or some shit. You almost fucking kissed me, dipshit. It's nothing big but I figured I wouldn't disgust you with just the idea of something that you could have done."

That seemed to stun Gavin into silence. "I almost kissed you?" He asked softly after a moment or two of awkward silence.

Michael shrugged and looked away, scratching his neck. He hadn't meant to tell Gavin, but he'd just gotten so frustrated with him with how blind he was to the whole thing. "That's what I said, moron. Don't worry, I'm not going to run away screaming just because you got too close. I get it, you were drunk. I mean you didn't even kiss me, so it's not a big deal."

"Would it be so bad if I had?" That got Michael's attention. He looked at Gavin, who was giving him another weird look he couldn't figure out, but before he could even think of a way to respond Gavin was getting up, patting him on the shoulder and telling him to think about it. The front door clicked shut quietly after him, and Michael thought about how it was uncharacteristically quiet of the man.

He sunk down onto the couch and frowned. What did Gavin mean? What was it with that stupid British fuck and giving Michael mixed signals?

Did that mean Gavin wanted to kiss him? If so, why did he always go off with other people and hook up with them, why not flirt with Michael? Why not at least show him even a little that he was interested? Maybe he was just defensive, thinking Michael was disgusted with the idea of kissing Gavin, even though that was the farthest thing from the truth.

One thing Michael knew was that he didn't have the energy to think about it alone.

To - Felix : hey can u come over? we dont have to do anything i just need some1 to talk to...

From - Felix : uhh sure i can b ovr in 10 is that ok?

To - Felix : sure, thnx.

Michael chucked his phone on the ground and then sighed. Felix was the only person he could really trust anymore, the only one who knew about Gavin and his troubles, and didn't judge him for any of it. He just listened and gave advice when Michael asked, but he was a great friend to have around in all the mess. Soulmates were not supposed to be this difficult.

In around 15 minutes, there was another knock at the door and Michael stumbled through his hallway to get it. "You're a little late," he teased once he'd opened the door, though his smile dropped when he noticed the disheveled state the man was in, with new hickeys lining his neck, "fuck, I didn't interrupt you with a client, did I? You could have said no dude, it's just some boring Gavin drama."

Felix simply shrugged, not seeming to care as he waltzed into Michael's apartment with the biggest smile. "I wasn't with a client, but let's not talk about that now." He said, hanging his coat by the door and leading Michael through his apartment like he knew it better than him. He wanted to ask what he was doing if he wasn't a client, but Felix's tone suggested they would talk about it later.

"Alright, how was your trip?" He asked instead, stepping into his kitchen and reaching into the fridge to grab them both beers.

"It was good. I met some... Interesting people. How did you entertain yourself without me?" Felix smirked, opening the bottle with his teeth before sipping at it. Michael wished he had a skill like that.

"My life doesn't revolve around you, you know." Michael laughed, already purring from the pleasant and charming company that was Felix.

"I'm glad. Some clients get a little too personal, honestly. With you, I don't mind the friendly teasing and chat, but I have to remember this is a job." The man said honestly, shrugging. Michael hopped on the counter, in roughly the same spot he'd been when he and Gavin had gotten drunk and tried not to let it bother him.

A few moments passed of Michael staring at his beer, trying to come up with a way to talk about what happened with Gavin, but nothing came. Everything he thought of was awkward and cliche, he'd ever really been good with talking to Felix until after they'd had sex, or were at least in bed.

Luckily for him, Felix noticed his discomfort and apparent lack of words to say and stepped into his space just the way Gavin had. "Would you like to get a bit more... Comfortable?" He breathed, lightly curling a hand around Michael's thigh.

"You wouldn't mind?" Michael asked softly, his eyes almost sliding shut while Felix led him towards his room, their lips almost touching the whole time.

"You know I wouldn't." Felix grinned, taking his hand and turning around to pull him into the room.

Felix was good at his job, there was no more to say about it. He got Michael to relax in just ten minutes, laying kisses between his thighs and taking advantage of Michael's sensitive tail. He always had fun with him.

"So, why am I here, Michael?" The man asked a few minutes after they had finished, laying against Michael's chest while he purred and absentmindedly toying with his tail.

"When you were gone..." He started, frowning just a bit as he fought to find the words, "Gavin came over, we got drunk and... Well he almost kissed me. I mean I think he did, he was kinda close and I thought he was going to. It wasn't a big deal, but I freaked out and pushed him away after, like with work and shit. I distanced myself from him. Then he got suspicious and wouldn't leave me alone about it. He came over and almost knocked down my damn door. I ended up telling him what happened and he asked me if it would have been a bad thing if he had kissed me."

Felix was quiet through the explanation, but frowned at the end. "That's it? Isn't that a good thing, Michael? That means he likes you, go talk to him!"

"But what if he didn't mean it like that? What if he was just being defensive? I could have gotten this whole thing wrong. Maybe he's not my soulmate, god. I'm so fucking stupid."

"Well, that I can agree with," Felix sighed, before smiling, "Michael, I don't know how you could be any more oblivious. Gavin loves you, can't you see it? I'm only hearing your side of the story, but to me it sounds like he has a thing for you. Stop being such a scaredy cat, literally. Go ask him what he meant."

Michael huffed and rolled his eyes. "Like I can just go up and ask him something like that." He laughed, no humor in his voice as he stared at the ceiling and thought. Maybe Felix did have a point, though. He shouldn't be so scared, it was ridiculous, he could simply ask Gavin and all of this would end. He'd move on if it ended badly, right? They could go back to being friends after all this shit.

"You can." The other man said, sitting up from his chest before moving to go get dressed.

"Are you leaving?" Michael asked, feeling a little dejected.

"Yep," Felix replied, tugging on his shirt before turning to Michael, "when I came here you asked me if I was with a client. I wasn't."

"And?"

"I was with my soulmate. I met him on my trip. I didn't want to ruin the mood. He's okay with me being a prostitute and all that, bless him, but I don't want to anymore. Not with him in my life, finally. I've waited far too long for him, so I'm not going to cock it up.  You were my last hurrah, I suppose. I liked you. This is the last time I'm sleeping with anyone else but him."

Felix was smiling, a whole new glow to him that Michael couldn't help but adore. In a friend way this time, though. Now that he was taken, it was easy for Michael to see him in a new light. He was so happy, he would have been jealous if he hadn't been happy for him, too.

"That's great!" He exclaimed, grinning as he hopped up to give Felix a hug. He probably should have been a bit more embarrassed, considering he was completely naked, but the man didn't seem to mind. "I'm happy for you, really. Figures you would get the easy soulmate." He teased, pulling back and moving to put some boxers on so he could lead Felix to the door when he was done getting dressed.

"Believe me, it wasn't easy. Bloody shy as all hell. Took me almost the entire trip to get him into bed with me. Gotta love him, though, it's adorable."

"Yeah, yeah, you're all cute and loving and shit, now shut up before I puke glitter or something." Michael chuckled, giving Felix one final hug at the door.

"Oh you love the domesticity," the Brit teased right back, kissing Michael's cheek chastely before he went, "remember, Michael; talk to him. It's not as bad as it seems, promise." He said, turning on his heel and strutting down the hall, leaving an annoyed yet amused Michael gawking after him.

He was probably right.

Probably.

 

* * *

 

Something to understand about Michael was that he was a fucking coward.

He'd said it a million times to himself, but it was true. Even after his night with Felix, he still hadn't approached Gavin at work for a total of two weeks. The days ticked by slowly, recording, editing, rinse and repeat. It was going through the motions until he could work up the courage to talk to Gavin. The longer he left it, the worse his fear got, the weirder he thought he'd seem. Gavin probably didn't even remember that night.

The looks he kept giving Michael said a different thing, however.

Before things got too out of hand Geoff - the saint that he was - conspired to get them both in the same place alone again where they would be forced to talk. He got Jack and Ryan in on his plan, then they were set.

"When was the last time us guys hung out? It's been at least over a month, I say we go out and get drunk. It's a Friday night, no work tomorrow to worry about, it's the perfect time! We're wasting our lives away here, doing nothing on weekends. Jack, how about you? You in buddy?" He asked casually, all smooth and charismatic like he thought he was. It took Jack all he had to keep a straight face at how dumb Geoff was being about this whole thing. Michael and Gavin were big boys in his opinion, they could work out their own problems.

"Can't, Caiti and I already made plans for a movie marathon tonight, sorry." He answered, not looking away from his screen where he was browsing Reddit.

"Ryan, what about you? You never come out with us, you have to tonight!" Geoff whined, actually managing to sound convincing. It was true though, Ryan was a private man with a family to look after, he didn't go drinking every Friday like some college student with too much pent up energy.

"Give me some warning before you make plans, Geoff. You think I can just call up my babysitter and have her over in only a few ours? She has her own life, man and my wife would kill me if I left her alone with the kids to go out partying."

"Fuckin' whipped." Michael griped from his seat, turning to face Geoff.

"Fine. Michael, Gavin, tell me you boys will at least come with me." The older man said giving Gavin a look that said 'if you don't say yes I will make your life at my home a living hell".

"I'm up for it. Haven't hung out with you alone in a while, Geoffers." Gavin chirped with fake enthusiasm, really just wanting to avoid the prank war that would ensue if Geoff didn't get his way. He must have been feeling really claustrophobic to be this serious about it.

"I don't know..." Michael hesitated, not wanting to be stuck almost alone with Gavin. Geoff was a good buffer, but he wasn't that good.

"Come on, you've been moping for weeks! Tell me you haven't been itching to get out and have some fun with friends."

He had a point.

So that was how he landed himself in a bar alone with Gavin, of all people, with an extra drink lying undrunk to the right of him.

Well, not exactly. Geoff had taken them there, had ordered his drink and sat down with them - even made small chit-chat for a while - before making an excuse to go to the bathroom. The waiter hadn't even had the chance to bring his drink by. Michael told him that, but all he could say was "If you gotta go, you gotta go." Before shrugging and walking off.

It had been almost half an hour since Geoff had needed to go and the condensation from his unused glass was making a small puddle that was trickling slowly closer to Michael's hand.

"Where is he?" Michael muttered to himself, frowning as he checked his phone yet again for a message that wasn't there. A message from Geoff telling them he'd gone home, or that he was fine and he was just taking a while. Something, anything would be better waiting and not knowing. At least if Geoff said he'd gone home Michael could make an excuse and flee, but he hadn't so Michael couldn't risk doing so without the fear of Geoff coming back to find him gone and chewing him out when they got back to work on Monday.

He hadn't started all that long ago; give him a break.

"Leave it to Geoff to copy a plan right out of a crappy sitcom." Gavin sighed, resting his chin on his hand and looking at him with dull eyes.

"What do you mean?" He asked, even though he had a sneaking suspicion what Geoff had done. Gavin was right, the plan was definitely from a crappy sitcom.

"He's set us up so we'll be alone and talk." The Brit whined, pouting at Michael. Who even did that sort of shit in real life?

"We can just go." Michael said.

"What's the point? We need to talk about this anyway. If we go back to work as is Geoff might just bloody lock us in a cupboard together, considering how good this plan of his was. I mean this would have taken planning and effort. Geoff doesn't do effort, the sodding bastard. I told him to keep out of my business."

Gavin's sentence trailed off into a mumble and Michael stared at him dumbly for a moment. "What do you mean?" he asked, "You talked to Geoff about  _our_ problems? God, could you not keep your dumb mouth shut for ten minutes?"

Maybe he was being a bit harsh, but could you blame him? He'd been on edge for weeks, not telling anybody except Felix about what was going on with him and Gavin, and that stupid fuck had gone and blathered to Geoff with just a little prodding? "Like I wanted to tell Geoff!" Gavin snapped, "I didn't bloody want to, for your information. I wanted our... Thing to be private, even though I don't know what exactly our thing _is_. Geoff was worried, too, as he should have been. I was moping, Michael - not that you noticed, oh no, far too caught up in your own problems to bother with me. Anyway, he would be a bad friend if he didn't step in and see what was wrong."

"That doesn't give you the right! What happens between us is between us. In case you haven't noticed, we're recorded pretty much constantly and I don't know about you, but I would like to keep some privacy where I can."

"Oh, you want your privacy do you? You're always hiding Michael, behind excuses, behind your fucking beanies and your jeans. Afraid and hiding from any chance at a good thing. You're so fucking terrified of being judge that you'll make yourself unhappy! You'll make yourself miserable and uncomfortable so no one will make you miserable and uncomfortable. It doesn't make a lick of sense!"

Michael saw red.

Who was Gavin to analyze him like this? All he said was that he would like some privacy and Gavin just had to spin it. "You're so fucking infuriating, do you know that? You're not a fucking doctor, you know. You don't get to make assumptions about me, okay? I have my fucking reasons for wanting things private, can't you see that?"

"I can, and those reasons are that you are a coward, Michael Jones! Always running, trying to escape the inevitable, never willing to take the plunge or get a little hurt instead of a lot. The longer you leave things, the worse it gets, don't you see that by now? Do you not learn?" Gavin asked, his voice turning into a whisper filled with venom when people started looking over, "You're the one who's infuriating. Do you not get it? It's been a month and you still haven't asked me about it, I'm not dumb, Michael. I know you think I forgot but it's been all I could think of ever since I left your place."

"What are you talking ab-"

"Don't interrupt me," the man said, deadly quiet and with a tone that sent chills through Michael's spine. He'd ever seen Gavin actually angry with him before, it was.. Frightening, to say the least. "Michael Jones, you are a coward, but I accept that. There are so many great things about you but you are awfully oblivious and it's starting to take its toll. If you're not going to ask what I meant; then I'll just tell you. I wanted to kiss you. I still bloody want to kiss you even though you're an obstinate bastard who can't wrap his head around the fact that someone could actually have feelings for him. You hate the idea of soulmates and I love it, but it's okay because even if we aren't soulmates I still managed to fall in love with you."

Love?

Michael was oblivious, but he wasn't that oblivious. By the time his mind caught up to what Gavin had said, the man had started to shrink back and look like he regretted saying it. 

So he kissed him.

He pulled Gavin by the scruff of his neck, ignoring the whimper it pulled from him as he smashed their lips together, relieved beyond belief that Gavin had been the first to say that because Michael would never have had the guts to. 

Gavin tasted like beer and mints but Michael didn't imagine he tasted any better, licking into Gavin's mouth with a fervor brought on by months of pining. It wasn't quite what he expected, the butterflies in his stomach, bells ringing type of kiss, but the beer sat pleasantly in his belly and gave him a nice buzz that made the kiss not too bad. They'd have time for those special kisses later, anyway.

He didn't care that probably more than a few people were staring at them; Gavin's fingers were curled tightly into his belt buckle and it was sending a heat through him he hadn't really experienced before. Things were definitely moving too fast for the public to see, so Michael called their waiter over and paid the bill, downing Geoff's undrunk glass of warm whiskey and pulling Gavin out of the bar with their linked arms. He called for an Uber to come pick them up and pressed Gavin to the wall outside while they waited, kissing over his jaw and slightly down his neck until a car pulled up.

They clambered in and managed to keep their hands mostly to themselves until they arrived back at Michael's place, almost breaking the door with how hard Michael shoved Gavin into it. After making out furiously for another five minutes, Michael finally had the will power to pull away and grab his apartment keys out of his pocket, blindly shoving it at the lock until it slid in. He turned the key and they stepped inside when the door swung open, Michael practically shoving Gavin inside in his haste.

"We don't-" Michael kissed Gavin, "have to-" he kissed him again, "do anything tonight-" and again, "we can just go to sleep." He managed to pull himself away from Gavin long enough to look him in the eyes as Gavin shook his head and pulled Michael back to him.

"We've wasted far too much time pissing about already, don't you think?" He breathed, tugging Michael down the hallway by his belt loop.

"Yeah." Michael mumbled, pressing a few wet kisses into Gavin's neck before lightly pushing him onto his bed once they reached his room. He kicked of his shoes while Gavin did the same, before crawling over him and hovering above him for a moment. 

Gavin was gorgeous. He wasn't sure that was exactly the right word to describe him, it didn't seem to be _enough_ , but he was drunk and his brain was a little fuzzy so he didn't think too long on it. His lips moved on their own, kissing and nipping along Gavin's neck where it seemed to be more sensitive.

He had a thing about his neck, didn't he? Michael had seen it the first day, when Geoff had cupped his neck and Gavin had quietened down. 

Fuck.

He was so, totally fucked.

"Off," he groaned, tugging at Gavin's shirt and pawing at the mess of hair underneath it until Gavin sat up and pulled it off. Michael couldn't get to kissing it soon enough, leading down to Gavin's jeans where he started to unbutton them. He knew Gavin could feel him half hard against his thigh, but it didn't seem to matter as he tugged down Gavin's jeans.

He let the man kick them off while he pulled off his own shirt and pants, chucking his beanie off to the side. Gavin's breath hitched as he ran his hand up his thigh, but it wasn't because of the feeling, like Michael thought. His eyes were set intently on Michael's ears, before flickering to his tail. "C-Can I...?" He asked, reaching for Michael's tail.

Michael nodded and Gavin's hand wrapped around the base, stroking it and biting his lip. He'd teased him before about him having a thing for Hyrbids, but this was fucking _great_.

Gavin was so clearly turned on by his cat features and Michael certainly wasn't complaining with how good it felt. He hadn't even fucking known his tail could be so sensitive. They spent a few minutes like that, Michael getting more and more turned on, his breath stuttering until he decided he'd had enough of teasing, playing. He wanted Gavin.

It was easy getting both of their boxers off, and it was easy taking some lube and preparing himself while Gavin rolled on a condom, it was definitely easy fucking him into the mattress, one hand curled loosely around his neck while the other pinned his wrists together against the bed.

What wasn't easy was after they both came. Michael had to force the energy to slide off Gavin and roll next to him while the other man still seemed in a world of his own.

"Wow." He said dumbly, grinning up at the ceiling while he mentally prepared himself to have to reach over and grab some tissues to clean them both. He was so tired, he really just wanted to fall asleep and let the mess be, but he knew it would be disgusting in the morning.

He could still slightly taste alcohol on his breath and he knew they'd both probably forget this in the morning, too caught up in their hangovers, yet it still felt... Perfect. Even though they both reeked of sex and sweat and looked a mess. He couldn't help but look at Gavin with complete adoration while the man just smiled at him, his eyes crinkling in that cute, happy way. 

He'd like to see that more often.

Sleep came almost instantly after he'd finally managed to clean them both up and chuck the used condom from Gavin in the trash can. It was a dreamless, but warm sleep, something he was glad for. It fit the night, really. No weird sex dreams about Gavin, no nightmares, not even dreams of their future together. He'd have plenty of time to think about it all later, to worry or be happy.

For now he was content with Gavin scooped up in his arms.

 

* * *

 

"Morning." Was the first thing he heard when he woke up. Gavin's face was only inches from his, a sleepy smiled etched on his lips while he moved across to kiss Michael softly.

"Morning," Michael said groggily in reply, a little confused as to what was going on, "what time is it?" he groaned, making the mistake of looking at his window and hissing at the bright light. Gavin just laughed.

"Don't know. Sometime in the afternoon. Geoff texted me not long ago, says the bartender told him what happened last night and gives his blessing and whatnot." Gavin mumbled, rolling onto Michael and hovering over him.

"We got  _fucked up_ last night," he laughed, giving Gavin a quick kiss so he wouldn't take it the wrong way, "is everything blurry for you too?"

Gavin chuckled with him, hopping off Michael to go put on boxers. "You haven't got your glasses on."

"I meant last night. Like the memories, dipshit." Michael teased, crossing his arms behind his head once he got his glasses on. Things _had_ been blurry for his sight, too, but he wasn't going to mention that to Gavin.

He kicked out his feet from the blankets where it was getting stuffy and closed his eyes for a moment, letting it all sink in. He and Gavin had had sex. Gavin loved him too.

What even were they now? Michael had no clue.

Whatever happened, he knew he wasn't pushing Gavin away again. He'd learned his lesson. "I know," Gavin grinned at him, "anyway wanna put some clothes on then we'll make breakfast? I don't imagine you have much in the fridge but we'll make do."

Michael sighed but smiled and nodded, kicking off his sheets and missing how Gavin's eyes made a beeline for his tattoo. They'd been far too caught up in the moment the previous night to even bother looking at the names they were both so sure wouldn't be their own.

"What's the name?" He asked bluntly, making Michael pause in stepping into some briefs. He could tell Gavin could see where the tattoo was, but couldn't read it from where Michael's leg was blocking half of it. He could make up a stranger's name, lie that the name on his thigh wasn't Gavin David Free but what was the point? Eventually Gavin would see anyway.

"What's _your_ name?" Deflection. His greatest technique. Gavin was right, he really did like hiding from confrontation.

"Gavin," he giggled lightly, before frowning, "doesn't matter. It was someone who didn't get me. I'm thinking of getting something to cover it."

"You shouldn't. It's something you spent your whole life looking at, right? If you cover it, it'll just make it worse. The person you got is an unlucky prick, but don't let it keep you down. You've got me, right?" He said, smiling as he pulled up the briefs, wanting more than ever for his tattoo to just disappear so Gavin couldn't see it.

"Who does yours say, Michael?" Gavin continued, taking a step closer to Michael, causing him to step back, "is it someone I know?" He looked betrayed, as if Michael could help the tattoo anymore than he could his own name. He didn't choose to get Gavin. He certainly didn't choose for Gavin to not get him.

"It's not what you think. You won't like what you see, okay?" Michael was practically leading now, hopping over his bed when Gavin tried to catch him, and letting out a few noises he wasn't proud of when Gavin managed to tackle him to the ground. He felt a bit weird while Gavin tried to get his thighs apart from where he was forcing them together to hide the tattoo. If he was anyone else looking at them, he'd probably think Gavin was trying to do something completely different.

The thing about having sex - especially riding someone - was that it took a lot of leg muscles. That coupled with the fact that Michael was incredibly hungover made for a bad combination, in which his legs didn't hold for very long while Gavin had the leverage.

Honestly, Gavin probably could have used his knees and taken a lot less time and effort, but to be fair to him, he was also hungover, not to mention kind of stupid when it came to quick thinking.

"'Gavin David Free'," he read quietly, tracing each individual letter and sending a shiver throughout Michael, "why do you have my name?"

"Why do you think?" Michael spat, feeling tears come to his eyes. Sure, he and Gavin both knew they had feelings for each other, but Michael knew that this could turn their new-found relationship on it's belly. Gavin could feel guilty for not having his name in return, there could always be a feeling that Michael loved Gavin more, any number of things. Not to mention it was just plain embarrassing.

"Michael..." Gavin whispered, before taking his hand and leading it up to his side, "Michael, look. Just look for a second." He said, cupping his cheek and turning his head. He could feel the letters of Gavin's tattoo and felt almost disgusted knowing that the name wasn't his.

_**Michael Vincent Jones** _

He should have expected it, really. Should have known the moment Gavin said that his soulmate didn't have his name. It would have been something the man had have come to him to complain about, he would have cried to Michael.

Everything made sense.

"We're the dumbest fucks in the entire world," He said, a grin starting to form, "are we in a T.V show? Like, seriously, we can't be this dumb, right? How did we not _know?"_ He laughed, pulling Gavin down for a quick kiss.

"We are very bloody dumb, boi. Why didn't you tell me you had my name? I asked you yours on the first day, you didn't even flinch, even though you already knew mine!"

Michael had the decency to look bashful. "Remember when I said I hated soulmates?" Gavin nodded, "Yeah, that's pretty much why."

"You're a donut."

"Shut the fuck up, like you're any better."

Gavin kissed him and laughed.

"I'm really not, am I?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's finally done!! It may be a little late (2 months haha don't kill me) but it was worth it for me. The only reason it got left so late was because I've been working on other stuff (like re-writing crap fics that will be done soon and working on an extremely long oneshot for NaNoWriMo which will be around 50-60K)
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this journey, even though it was barely edited, if at all. I might come back one day and fix up some mistakes and plot holes, but until then :)

**Author's Note:**

> Extra note: if I have mistakes please please tell me so I can fix them, I tried to edit it but its 10 thousand words and I wrote them so its hard to make myself re-read it knowing its going to be horrible. I hope this isn't horrible. I'm sorry


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